You have to feel sorry for this little lass at her first communion (top left). There she is, minding her own eucharistic business, when a living-dead hotel bell-boy creeps up behind her with a TV aerial poking out of his round hat.

But this is no ordinary zombie. It's a JPII Christmas ornament, looking, it has to be said, more Munster than minister. There again, what better place for the Vicar of Christ than dangling haplessly from the outstretched tip of your Christmas tree?

Take heart from the fact that the JPII ornament set has "been endorsed by the Vatican in Rome as well as by the National Conference of Catholic Bishops" and will "add new grace to your home and fortify your faith". Totus tuus (totally yours) for as little as $45.