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	TOP 10 OFFENSIVE JOKES Here is the Top 10 of offensive jokes, as voted for by our readers on the Laugh Judgment discussion board. No. 10: Calling for Jesus 14% of people found this offensive or very offensive An Indian man dies and arrives at the Pearly Gates. "Yes, how can I help?" asks St Peter. "I'm here to meet Jesus," says the Indian man. St Peter looks over his shoulder and shouts, "Jesus, your cab is here!" Click here to read discussion on this joke. No. 9: A sign in the sky 20% of people found this offensive or very offensive Q: What's white and zips across the sky at 100 mph followed by a band of angels? A: The coming of the Lord. Click here to read discussion on this joke. No. 8: Jesus and the motel 26% of people found this offensive or very offensive Jesus walks into a motel, throws a bag of nails on the counter and says, "Can you put me up for the night?" Click here to read discussion on this joke. No. 7: Picture of Jesus 27% of people found this offensive or very offensive What's the difference between real Jesus and a picture of Jesus? It only takes one nail to hang up the picture. Click here to read discussion on this joke. No. 6: Adventure trip for boys 37% of people found this offensive or very offensive A Catholic priest, a Boy Scout leader and a lawyer take some boys out on an adventure trip. On the flight over, there is engine trouble and the plane is about to go down. "We have a problem", says the pilot. "There are only three parachutes!" The Boy Scout leader suggests they give them to the boys. "Screw the boys," shouts the lawyer. "Is there time?" asks the priest. Click here to read discussion on this joke. No. 5: What do you give... 38% of people found this offensive or very offensive Q: What do you give a paedophile who has everything? A: A bigger parish. Click here to read discussion on this joke. No. 4: Hitler at the Pearly Gates 40% of people found this offensive or very offensive Hitler walks up to the Pearly Gates and says to St Peter, "I'd like to come in." St Peter: "Not likely!" Hitler: I've repented and I've given back all the gold and treasures that I stole from the Jews, and I'm really sorry." At that point, Jesus walks up and asks what's going on. St Peter: "It's Hitler here, he wants to come in." Jesus: "Bugger off!" Hitler: "No, it's true! To prove it, I've got a six foot solid gold cross I can't find the owner of. I could give that to you." Now Jesus was partial to crosses, so he went to see God. Jesus: "Hey Dad, I've got Hitler outside and he wants to come in now he's repented." God: "Tell him to get lost!" Jesus: "But Dad, he's given back all the gold that he stole from the Jews - except for a six foot, solid gold cross he can't find the owner for. He says I can have it." God: "And what do you want with a solid gold cross? You couldn't even carry a fuckin' wooden one!" Click here to read discussion on this joke. No. 3: Priest and pimple 60% of people found this offensive or very offensive What's the difference between a priest and a pimple? A pimple waits until you're 13 before coming on your face. Click here to read discussion on this joke. No. 2: Following St Onan 69% of people found this offensive or very offensive Q: How does Jesus masturbate? A: [Mime: place the palm of your hand over your groin, then move your hand away from and towards yourself, as if you were using the hole through your palm.] Click here to read discussion on this joke. No. 1: Girl on a cliff 72% of people found this offensive or very offensive A little girl is standing on top of a cliff, looking down at the sea and crying her eyes out. A priest approaches and says, "My child, why are you so upset?" The little girl turns to him and says, "My mummy and daddy were in their car – and it just rolled over the cliff and smashed on the rocks down there." The priest slowly looks around him while unbuttoning his cassock and says, "It's just not your day, is it?" Click here to read discussion on this joke.
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